Filed under: Pregnancy
Keith and Kate and bump, originally uploaded by dogmilque.
This was taken two weeks ago at Sean and Haley’s wedding. Two hours before I wrapped that shawl around my head and donned a North Face down vest under a massive windbreaker. Three hours before I was given some new nicknames, which included: Bag Lady, Babushka, and Afghan Soldier, About 5 hours before I waddled to the car for an hour nap before rounding up the drunkards to drive them home.
Nuggy has discovered something charming. He is filling out my uterus and can no longer do laps like he used to. He used to try to match his Mama lap for lap when I swam in the pool. Now he just streeeetches out his body sometimes. This feels little like, well, nothing comes to mind. But it makes the places where his feet and head push against my belly feel like they are being ripped. Just a little bit ripped.
I can no longer easily trudge up the hill to the goat pasture and wrangle one doe out of the enclosure while keeping the other goats in. I used to be really good at that. I can’t haul that fence around and hike up and down hills setting up new pasture either. I think I am done with that for this year.
I am officially 24 weeks. Some would call that 6 months. Pregnancy months are very confusing because when a woman reaches her due date, she is actually 10 months pregnant. So 24 weeks is 6 months, but my third trimester won’t start for another 3 weeks. Confused? I am.
We started weaning the baby goats which means they sleep in a separate stall at night and they cry non-stop for a few nights. I find myself responding differently to a baby goat’s cry than I used to. I know in my brain that they are fine and safe and fed, but I want to leap out of bed and comfort them. At five this morning, I finally couldn’t stand it anymore and went down to milk the does so that they could be reunited with their babies. Now I will eat a donut and go back to sleep for a while. That’s what freedom means to me. Happy Fourth!
*People keep telling me. Over and over. “Enjoy this time!” “You’ll never get to sit down again!” “You won’t read a book for another 5 years!” “You’ll never sleep in again for the rest of your life!”
Okay, okay, I get it. Pass the donuts.
Filed under: Uncategorized
Hi everybody! It was 105 yesterday and will be again today. And tomorrow. Did you hear that I am pregnant? I am glad that I am not 8 months pregnant in this heat, but still. Pa-regnant. We swam in a nice cool pool yesterday and today we’ll swim in a nice cool lake, so life isn’t that terrible. I do feel sometimes like I have been beaten up recently and that my feet have been injected with jelly and my insides are on fire and I wish I could poop. Pooping is nice, isn’t it? Like when you can do it every day? I used to poop every day at the same time of day and never thought about it. Not anymore!
I might feel like I have been beaten because I sleep now for a few hours every night sitting upright and sideways on the couch. Lanugo doesn’t like me to recline on my back (something about not being deprived of oxygen, blah blah blah, cry me a river, BABY). So I sleep contorted among pillows upright on my side. Sometimes with a large orange cat kneading my hip lovingly. If I lie down flat for too long, the camp stove in my belly roars to life and flames lick my tonsils.
But! We might have a blackberry crop this year if the heat doesn’t rise above 110 or so for the next couple of weeks. You have no idea how happy and excited this makes me. Jam, pies, tarts, cobblers and syrups, here we come! And swimming. Thank you Jesus for swimming. It really is the best invention.
Did you listen to Raffi as a kid? I did. I sang the hell out of Baby Beluga all the time when I was little. Lanugo reminds me of that song when he turns over in my belly. I sing it to him loudly and off tune. It’s sad that Keith’s only memory of Raffi is watching a video where Raffi strums a guitar while sliding down a slide singing, “Penis! Vagina!” and various other body parts. I think the song was about becoming comfortable with your body, but little serious Keith was horrified. We’ll have to get a Raffi CD for Lanugo and Keith can reacquaint himself with Raffi’s less shocking side.
Well, time to go. Baby needs waffles. With whipped cream and peaches.
Filed under: Pregnancy
A customer I hardly know gifted me with a brand new Moby Wrap (I know, right?) and I wanted to try it out. In my search for a baby-sized model, I discovered that Mr. Muffins the Cat does not understand or value the concept of baby wearing and attachment parenting. I am so glad he is neutered because if he weren’t, his kittens would be eating Frosted Flakes while watching Sponge Bob by the time their eyes opened.
I have another prenatal appointment on Monday, and in anticipation of the weigh-in, I breakfasted on three M&M’s, some homemade vanilla pudding, and a donut. What’s that you say about “quality calories”? I can’t hear you. My ears are stuffed with Oreos.
I am grateful, actually that I have not had many out of control, unhealthy cravings so far in this pregnancy. I have heard stories of women who couldn’t help but eat an entire Mud Pie every other day, and I am glad that I am not having to fight urges like that.
It is cruel, however, that my one strong pregnancy craving, Tapatio, is something I can no longer eat. I have reached the Heartburn from Hades phase of pregnancy. In my birthing class last week I listened to all the other women complain about having to sleep sitting up in bed because of heartburn, and I thought, “Oh, that’s too bad for them. I am so glad that’s not happening to me”. I swear to you, that same night I was struck down mightily with the worst heartburn I have ever felt. I’ve had about 6 hours of sleep total this week.
That will teach me…about babies…or something.
Filed under: Pregnancy
My baby exploded this week and now I am making lots of “oof” noises as I get up from the couch or tie my shoes. Yesterday I was knitting and watching The Duchess with Jess and I saw my child wave from the womb for the first time. He or she was dancing a boogie and waving wildly and I could see and feel it clearly. This morning Baby high fived his Papa while I was lying in bed. Time never stands still. I have been thinking about this a lot lately, about how quickly this pregnancy is flying by, and how my baby will be out and growing before I know it. I am already trying to tighten my grip what hasn’t happened yet so that it doesn’t slip through my fingers and pass by too quickly.
I’ve been calling the baby “He” a lot lately and Keith corrects me and says, “She!” which is silly because the baby is most likely a hermaphrodite.
- Today I am nineteen weeks pregnant. Just one week shy of half baked. I would like to take this opportunity to give a shout out to my homie: Second Trimester. Yo, you rock with a mad deep peppyness that I appreciate to the max.
- Sometimes I find myself talking about my very un teenage thug life in the voice of my quasi thug teenage clients’. “Aww yeah, I laid up in my crib last night and started a novel in bed, totally propped up with hella pillows.”
- One of the top contenders in the pregnancy questions line-up is, “I bet you eat a lot of pickles and ice cream! Seriously, though. What kinds of weird things are you craving?” The only thing that I can think of is that now I cannot get enough of Amy’s bean, cheese, and rice burritos micro-waved and doused with Tapatio. I could eat about nine of them right now.
- Nuggy is moving around in my womb now. It’s very subtle, but I feel him dusting the furniture and practicing Tai Chi. He is so smart, you guys. He is only 6 inches long and he can grasp things, swallow, recognize my voice, and dictate letters. We start our birthing class on Monday night, I hope I don’t accidentally birth him during the class while I am practicing birthing because then we’ll have to stuff him back in.
- In conclusion, I want Nuggy to be a girl because girls are so sweet and adorable, but I want him to be a boy because boys are so sweet and adorable. The end.
Filed under: Pregnancy
Dear Keith,
Today you turn 30 years old. I’ve been thinking lately about all the reasons I love you, and I picked 30 that I thought you should know.
30. You do a funny dance at parties.
29. You are responsible with money.
28. You are respectful.
27. You’re not worried about appearing to be “macho”
26. Your love for your family is obvious.
25. You are fiercely loyal.
24. You are musically talented.
23. You bring me pastries.
22. You’re thoughtful.
21. You care for animals with love and respect.
20. You can make me laugh.
19. You were an adorable child.
18. You make me feel cherished.
17. You’re handsome.
16. You’re a great cook.
15. You do dishes.
14. You like to snuggle.
13. You love my baking.
12. You’re crazy about breakfast.
11. You only want good things (except for Pop tarts).
10. You’re kindhearted.
9. You’re earnest.
8. You’re honest.
7. You are the hardest worker I know.
6. The way you looked at me when I walked down the aisle toward you.
5. You are an independent thinker.
4. You do great impressions.
3. You love to take me out to fancy dinners.
2. You refuse to go to bed angry.
1. I know more than you do what a natural you will be at fatherhood. Our child will love having you for a papa.
How did I get so lucky? Happy Birthday Love.
-Your Katy Bunkins
